Archive for the ‘Homosexuals in the Military’ Category

Hatred in the name of G-d

September 17, 2012

Hello, Friends,

I have been delinquent in posting this week.  I had a VSO meeting on Tuesday and that can take an ugly turn some days.  Most of the time, I enjoy hanging with those guys.  I’m the only female and my husband is also in the Post and they have come to accept me as their little sister.  Unfortunately – we still have our share of mysogonistic sons of bitches!  Tuesday night one was in rare form.

Believe it or not – the man is a preacher.  Only he knows the will of G-d and only he knows how G-d feels about things.  He knows exactly who G-d loves and who G-d hates.  I’m not sure what version of the Bible he uses, but he pulls out scriptures interpretation that I know is not in there!!  He even defended the Westboro Baptist Church group for protesting Veteran funerals in the name of hate.  So, as he is sitting there talking about all of the things that G-d “expressly forbids” I am held captive to his hateful ramblings because I have to lock up the building.

“G-d expressly forbids any woman being placed in a position of authority over a man!”  He preached on.  Really?  Really?  Holy crap I grew up with some of this type of crap and by the time he reaches that point of his “sermon” I have just about had it.  Every fiber of my being wanted to point out the women in the Bible that have been authority over men – but I keep my mouth shut.  This is the same person that viewed my Command as illegitimate…just because I have ovary and boobs – and brought a few of his like minded buddies along for the ride.

He railed against women, he railed against homosexuals, he railed against Muslims and he railed against bikers.  He railed against the young troops coming home from Iraq and Afghanistan who are experiencing mental health issues – “They must have been wrong in the head before – why should the American Tax-Payer take care of them!”  He is very non-prejudicial – cause he hates everyone who isn’t an old white guy who thinks like him.  Every sour, hateful, venomous remark was punctuated with the words, “G-d says!”

Hatred in the name of G-d is one thing that I cannot stomach.  If you want to hate someone then be man enough to hate them outright – don’t bring G-d into your deluded little fantasy!  Don’t justify your hatred by painting it with G-d!  Most of the readers here know that I am a practicing Catholic, I attend Mass on Sunday and I serve in the Church community.  I was raised a “church hopper” by a Southern Baptist mother (who still believes I am going to hell for becoming a Catholic.)  I know my Bible and I know how men like him justify their hatred.

I also know that there are many more Biblical passage about love, forgiveness, respect and caring for your neighbor than there are passages that tell us to “hate.”  In fact – there are NO Bible passages that tell us it is okay to “Hate” another person.  I also know that no matter what we have done, what we are doing or what we will do can separate us from the love of G-d…because he loves us that much.

This man’s attitude, and the attitude of so many others just like him, is what justifies the predator.  You may think I am making a leap here – but I promise you I am not.  He exerts his power and his control with his title of “preacher.”  We saw it in my own church in the sexual abuse of young children by those dirty, sick bastard priests that dared to touch a child!  (My Church…but thankfully not in my Parish.)  I have known excellent Priests who bring credit to their position – just as I have seen excellent soldiers (officers and NCO) who bring great credit to their positions.  I have also known the one’s who use their position of authority to execute the most devious, self-serving and sick fucking actions on the lives of other people.  They exercise their hatred and call it “G-d.” 

I wonder what their judgement day will be like?  I would like to think that there is a special place in hell for those who would harm in the name of “G-d.”  Even then I don’t want to think about what they may have to suffer – because I have seen and lived through so much suffering and sorrow that I don’t want ANYONE to suffer – not even my attackers or my acusers.  

In some ways I feel that I could justify a desire to see them suffer – hell…I could probably justify being the one to light the fire on some of them!  But that would be hatred in the name of G-d…and we have way too much of that going on these days.  I think I would rather choose love – and forgiveness – if not for them then for myself. 

Peace,

Joan

Warning – Graphic Content!

December 1, 2010

The actual title of this post is:  Sluts and Bitches – but I didn’t want to put that into the title.  I found something incredibly disturbing out there on the Web today and it has me boiling mad!

What is the difference between a slut and a bitch?  A slut will sleep with anybody…a bitch will sleep with anybody but you.

A part time judge down in Hamilton County TN by the name of Joe Rehyansky posted on the site Daily Caller that Lesbians should be allowed in the military…but Gay men should not.  Sounds strange…until he goes on to say that this would give straight men a “fair shot” at converting these women.

And I quote:

 “It fell to men to swing through the trees and scour the caves in search of as many women as possible to subdue and impregnate — a tough job but someone had to do it.”

Apparently, this “judge” believes that the best way to turn Lesbians back to the “straight” life is to RAPE them!  And I am going to be very graphic here…But apparently, what these women need is just a little “dickens cider.”  Yeah, apparently “dick” can cure lots of things – like a woman’s desire to be her own person.  It can also cure that whole “bitch” thing.  Being a “bitch” just means that you aren’t getting laid enough.  Don’t like the fact that I outrank you…just “subdue” me and once you give me that magical organism that only your dick can give me that will take me from being a strong willed woman to one that swoooonnns on your very touch.  Hell, you are probably going to sleep with one of  us so it is going to be me!  Don’t fight it baby…I’m gonna make you feel sooo good! 

WHATEVER!!!!

What in the HELL is wrong with this guy.  The last thing we need is some JUDGE running around giving his personal opinion about how to make a woman do what he wants a woman to do!  After all, if it is “okay” to “subdue” a Lesbian to make her “straight” then is it okay for a man to rape someone to make that woman “behave” the way he wants her to.  Gee, maybe if we just all decided to use “force” to get what we want.  I mean, if some guy is being an asshole do I get to shoot him?  After all – that would be an easy way for me to “subdue” him to my will – to do what I want him to do.  Or does this only go for women.

It is this gosh damn stinking attitude in the military that has us in this situation to begin with.  Did I mention that this guy is an Army Veteran?  Surprise, Surprise, Surprise there Gomer!  Gee, I wonder how many things got pushed under the rug by this ass wipe and filed under the title of “boys will be boys.”  You know, he goes on to talk about that too – that homosexual males, and all males in general, just can’t control those natural urges that make them want to rape, pillage and plunder.  Cause you know…boys will be boys and we don’t want no “fgts” forcin themselves on our soldiers.  Male soldiers…that is…cause the straight males have got a mission of converting all those Lebians.

I’m gonna stop here – because the more I say the angrier I am getting.  For all of you out there who think that we survivors (male and female) are just crazy little whiny babies…you read this “judge’s” words and see how you would feel if that man was near your daughter or wife or sister. 

I’d love to tell you how I would feel – but it just might be misunderstood and get me in trouble.

Lord – save us from these kinds of IDIOTS!

Joan

Doing Away With an Injustice

October 20, 2010

Which one of these is the “gay” servicemember?

 Good question…huh?  It is hard to tell from this angle.  As a matter of fact, in my years in the military I served with a number of homosexuals and many of them I didn’t even know they were gay until sometime later.

People seem to have this impression that if we allow gays to serve in the military we will have people doing “inappropriate” things in a foxhole.  As though a heterosexual soldier can control his or her “urges” but a homosexual soldier can’t.  Well, if I may be so bold to speak for all of us Military Sexual Trauma survivor…the “straight” troops don’t always do so well at “control” either!

There is a time to “grow-up” and the time is now.  If a person loves their country enough to offer their lives for the person next to them, then they should be allowed to serve with dignity and with honor!  Race, Creed, Religion, Political Status should not matter and neither should the person’s sexual orientation, so long as that person makes a choice to serve in a professional manner.  That doesn’t just go for a homosexual…it applies to heterosexuals as well!  NO one should be humping in a Foxhole and I don’t think that you can make a correlation between common sense and sexual orientation.  The rules are the rules and they apply, or should apply, to everyone.

I think that people have this overwhelming idea that we will have servicemembers showing up in “drag” or something.  Don’t you think that your average person (straight or gay) realizes that you have to follow military regulations! 

That’s right, boys and girls…it IS time to grow up.  It is time to realize that a “gay” soldier can die for their country just like a “straight” soldier can.  You really think bullets and bombs care if someone is gay? 

Then why do we?

Peace

Joan

The Ones I Left Behind

May 8, 2010

Today I want to talk about the women I left behind in my unit after I was forced out. I did everything that I could to stop what was happening to all of us. But I was doing it all alone. I went to JAG. I went to the Inspector General. My complaint went all the way to Brigade, and there was a formal IG Investigation in my unit.

Many of my chain of command were moved out of the unit, and lost their jobs. But as the old saying goes in the military, “F*** up and move up,” so many of them got better jobs at the state level. The IG Investigation showed that yes, both men and women had been sexually harassed and even assaulted, but no charges were ever  processed.

It was a great comfort to me at the time, knowing that although I lost everything, I was helping to prevent this from happening to others. But I was wrong. One voice in a tornado goes unheard. One of the women who was being sexually harassed very publically by Ranger Wags at the same time as me, refused to come forward. When questioned by investigators, she denied everything.

So what happened to her? She endured it for months, and finally after a few years had no choice but to leave the military to get away from it. She had been one of my closest friends at one time, but when she refused to stand up and help not only herself, but any other woman, I walked away from her. Over the past 10 years I run into her on occasion, and each time she wants to pick right back up where we left off. I am just not able to do that. For me it was a matter of principle, and still is.

I know that 2 voices in a storm still might not have been heard, but it might have encouraged more voices to come forward, and then something might have been done. I bring this up now, because 2 days ago she sent me a message on Facebook, because she found me on my stepson’s friend list. We chatted for a little while, and again, she wants to go back to the way it was before. I don’t know if I can do that.

We talk about forgiveness, and getting on with our lives.  But how do you forgive one that could have changed everything, and still kept silent? I know that she wants to be my friend again, for the same reason that Joan and I are so happy that we found each other. Because then she wouldn’t be alone. I know that she suffered, and I know that I should forgive, but because of her silence so many others wound up suffering in the end. I really do not know how to proceed with her, and I don’t think I am at a place where I could completely forgive her yet.

In case you haven’t figured it out yet, I am still beyond very bitter by everything that I went through in my 11+ years. Joan has always been the nice one, and I am the loud and outspoken one. I also wanted to point out, that although things got better in my unit for a few months after the IG Inspection, and death of my career, it all got so much worse for women after that. And, it is still very bad. The only thing that changed was that it got worse, and women got even more afraid to speak up.

When will we learn?

Brigid

Love of Country

March 27, 2010

I’m double posting this morning.  Mainly because I have a lot to say and no way to make it all make sense in a single post.  I don’t want to make my posts so long that they take a long time to read and digest.  Possibly, it is because most of my friends know that I can’t order a pizza in 500 words or less, so how can I describe all of this in a reader’s digest version.

Questions that have always bothered me about the US Military…

Why is a woman’s life worth more than a man’s?  Any idea?  Why is it noble and honorable for a man to lose his life in service to his Country but it is considered shameful for a woman to do the same?  Why is it that only a Heterosexual Male can have a deep love of his country?  Let me make note that it has only been in the last 50 years or so that a Black man or a Native American or a Hispanic man was allowed to serve equally alongside his Caucasian brothers. 

Why is it that we continue arguing over whether or not a person with a different sexual orientation can be a good soldier?  We’re not talking about the Perez Hilton’s or Ms. Jay’s of the world, stereotypical characterizations of what it means to be a homosexual.   We are talking about good men and good women who love their country and want the opportunity to serve.  At the same time I can’t help but fear for the gay men who will be the first to break this barrier.  If they still can’t protect the soldiers that the Military has from this abuse…then what will happen to those first men to serve openly? 

We all give up parts of our identities when we join the military.  We are all supposed to follow the rules.  If a person is willing to follow the rules – I will share a foxhole with them!  Why do we let our petty hatred and bigotry blind us from the real issue.  Do you really care if the person in your foxhole is Black or White?  Heck no, I care if they can shoot!  I care if they can watch my back!  I happen to like the color purple.  I happen to like certain shades of cornflower blue.  I don’t wear them in uniform because that is not the job! 

Why does the UCMJ apply to only certain people?  Part of the purpose of the Military is that we are all equal and important members of the team.  From the highest General to the lowest Private, we are all supposed to live by one book of rules.

It is widely accepted that RAPE is about POWER.  It is about CONTROL.  It has nothing to do with SEX.  A person who is RAPING another person does not want to have SEX they want to have CONTROL.  Why is it then, that when allegations of abuse or rape are made,  the sexual activites of the victim come into play? 

I was speaking to someone the other night and he does not know that I am a survivor of MST.  We were, however, discussing that same situation.  He said that he has a female veteran friend whose claim of RAPE was denied because she was on BIRTH CONTROL.  He asked me if I had ever heard of that.  Unfortunately I have and it makes me sick.

US MILITARY POLICY ON RAPE AS EXPLAINED BY ME:

If a person states that they have allegedly been raped the charges of rape will automatically be ignored if the following conditions exist:

1 – the person claiming rape was ever in their life sexually active.

2 – the person claiming rape followed a military order in any way – ie…come into my office now!

3 – the person claiming rape was a member of the US Military.

4 – if the person who allegedly committed the RAPE is friends with the powers that be…all charges are immediately ignored and the best way out of this is to PROMOTE the RAPIST.

Essentially, boys and girls, the only way that you can be successfully RAPED in the US Military is if you are a VIRGIN who has never been any where near any member of the same or the opposite sex at anytime during your life.  Of course, we will ignore the charges anyway and blame you, because there must be something wrong with you..if you claim to have been raped.

Of course, as a special note for a females who claim to have been RAPED, please know that regardless of your virgin status…you could not have been RAPED because ou were ASKING FOR IT when you joined the military.

Finally, you can’t rape the willing, male or female, so you must have somehow asked for it.

Yup, I got a case of the “angries” this morning.  The previous explanation sounds pretty “drama queen” and over the top.  Let me promise you this…each of those examples are true.  I hate that they are true…but they are.  I have heard these things from multiple people in addition to my own experiences.  Part of the experience that goes with a desire to help other Brothers and Sisters who are living with this is the research and understanding of exactly what is happening out there. 

Right now in Washington DC the big debate is the “don’t ask don’t tell” policy on homosexuals in the military.  Please don’t think that I am downing homosexuals…because I am not.  I may be a conservative in my spiritual and political views, but I also believe that EVERYONE has something to give to their country.  I believe that ANYONE who wants to serve should be allowed to do so if they meet the physical and mental requirements of the job they have to do.

What I would like to see is Washington DC and all the political and military organizations take up the US Military’s “DON’T TELL” policy on RAPE in the UNITED STATES MILITARY. 

Don’t you think it is about time?

Joan