Sorrow in Battalions

When sorrows come – they come not single spies
– but in battalions ”  William Shakespeare

I have been hearing this quote over and over lately – mostly because it has been very true.  I have a 16 year old son – he’s handsome, brilliant, and now he is a drug abuser.  I found out he had been using RX and Marijuana just before Christmas.  He ran away a couple of weeks ago and was with a friend 10 days before he came home.  We finally decided to do an emergency admission through a large University Hospital after I discovered he had been making comments about wanting to die.  They sent us home.  We are waiting to hear from them about finding an inpatient program – we are still waiting.  I may have to go to court to have him legally committed.  The really shitty thing is that my insurance covers this!  Even shittier is that my son wants help!!  He is willing!  I just don’t know what to do or how to do it anymore.

Add on to this – my best friend has been very sick with pneumonia.  I am worried sick about her.  I love ya, Brigid!

My husband has been having problems with his leg – funny sensations.  Now he is showing weakness on the left side.  His memory hasn’t been right – I am always the one who loses the car keys…not him.  He asks me 6 or 7 times if I have paid a bill.  It has been over a week and we are still waiting to hear from his MD.  His mom was just a little older than he is now when she suffered three major strokes that left her paralyzed on one side for the rest of her life.

As if that isn’t enough – my right breast is giving me fits…no one seems to know the cause – so they want me to have surgery.  When do I have time?!  It probably isn’t cancer…but they just can’t say for sure.

I’m tired.  I’m just very, very tired and I don’t know what to do anymore.  I don’t feel like anything is going well. 

I beg your prayers.




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